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If you are concerned about your child, have a talk with her or him
Pay attention to your child's eating habits. If you notice an intense preoccupation with food, weight, and exercise, especially if it affects different parts of her or his life, it may signal a deeper problem. Have a talk with your child to gauge what's going on.
Ask specific questions about food amounts (too little or too much) and exercise. If she or he becomes angry or defensive, you may consider seeing a professional with expertise in eating disorders. Be sure to validate your child's feelings and encourage discussion.
Things You Can Do
As a parent or other caregiver, you can help your child develop a positive body image and relate to food in a healthy way. Here are some ideas:
1. Make sure your child understands that weight gain is a normal part of development, especially during puberty.
2. Avoid negative statements about food, weight, and body size and shape.
3. Allow your child to make decisions about food, while making sure that plenty of healthy and nutritious meals and snacks are available.
4. Compliment your child on her or his efforts, talents, accomplishments, and personal values.
5. Restrict television viewing and watch television with your child and discuss the media images presented.
6. Encourage your school to enact policies against size and sexual discrimination, harassment, teasing and name calling; support the elimination of public weigh-ins and fat measurements.
7. Keep the communication lines with your child open.
"...if a father agrees with our culture's shared fantasy that all your problems will be solved if you have a perfect body, he will be contributing to the development of an eating disorder. However, a father can give his daughter other messages about beauty, self-worth, and body image that can counteract these strong cultural influences. Girls need a male adult to give corrective feedback and to balance the cultural pressures about being thin, sexy, and successful."
-Margo Maine, PhD, in Father Hunger
Definitions
· Disordered eating refers to troublesome eating behaviours, such as restrictive dieting, bingeing, or purging, which occur less frequently or are less severe than those required to meet the full criteria for the diagnosis of an eating disorder.
· Binge eating disorder means eating large amounts of food in a short period of time, usually alone, without being able to stop when full. The overeating or bingeing is often accompanied by feeling out of control and followed by feelings of depression, guilt, or disgust.
· Overexercising is exercising compulsively for long periods of time as a way to burn calories from food that has just been eaten. People with anorexia or bulimia may overexercise.
· Bulimia nervosa is characterised by cycles of binge eating and purging, either by vomiting or taking laxatives or diuretics (water pills). People with bulimia have a fear of body fat even though their size and weight may be normal.
· Anorexia nervosa is self-starvation. People with this disorder eat very little even though they are thin. They have an intense and overpowering fear of body fat and weight gain
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How To Help a Friend Who May Have
An Eating Disorder
A person who is eating too much may need help
Your friend may need help if she or he is binge eating. Binge eating means eating large amounts of food in a short period of time, usually alone, without being able to stop when full. People with binge eating disorder do not try to get rid of the food they have eaten. We all overeat sometimes-at parties, on holidays, or when we eat a favourite food. Students may eat a lot because they are growing and are very hungry. But your friend may have a problem if she or he feels out of control when overeating. People with binge eating disorder may feel disgusted with themselves or feel depressed or very guilty after overeating.
If you are reading this, chances are that you are worried about someone who might have an eating disorder. You might be worried about a friend at school, or possibly a sister or brother. Maybe you have seen your friend throw away food instead of eating. Maybe you have seen your friend vomit on purpose or take laxatives or diet pills. Perhaps your friend seems sad or complains about being fat or feeling worthless.
A person who is not eating enough may need help
Most of us grow up hearing about family members and friends who are trying to lose weight, and we do not think much about it. However, some people go too far. Being obsessed with body fat or losing weight can be a sign of stress or depression. People who develop eating disorders, such as anorexia or bulimia, often remember that their problems started when they began dieting.
· People who have anorexia eat very little even though they are thin. They have an intense fear of body fat and weight gain.
· People with bulimia will get rid of food that they have just eaten by vomiting or taking laxatives or diuretics (water pills). They also have a fear of body fat even though their size or weight may be normal for them.
· Overexercising is when someone feels driven to exercise as a way to burn calories from food that she or he has just eaten. People with anorexia or bulimia may overexercise.
Your friend's health may be in danger
· Not eating enough can make someone feel cold, tired, moody, or grumpy. Not eating can cause dry hair and skin, interfere with a girl's menstrual cycle, and weaken young people's bones.
· Vomiting can damage your throat and teeth, and using laxatives can hurt your intestines and other parts of your body.
· Binge eating can lead to obesity or being overweight.
If you are concerned about your friend, don't keep your suspicions to yourself
In a calm and caring way, tell your friend what you saw or heard.
Use "I" statements, and let your friend know that you are concerned.
Here are some suggestions:
· "I'm worried about you because you haven't eaten lunch this week."
· "I heard you talking about taking laxatives . . . (or diet pills) and that scares me."
· "Are you O.K.? Were you vomiting after lunch? I am concerned about you."
Importantly really listen carefully to what your friend says and tell a mature person about your concerns.
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